Little Alexx Blog

Why is self care solely marketed to women? I was at the store today getting groceries and saw the cover for a magazine titled “Loving yourself, caring for yourself.” I automatically thought of countless men and women in my life who could benefit from the magazine but was disappointed when I saw that the cover had a floral theme with the cutout of a female shape. Do men not need to love and care for themselves? *Spoiler…they do!

Media and the market has us thinking self care is bubble baths, candles, face masks, watching a movie, eating icecream, getting into bed and relaxing, going on a walk, etc. Hey, who doesn’t love a good movie in bed stuffing your face with icecream??? But, sorry to tell ya, it’s not really doing much for ya in the long run. Don’t get me wrong, we all need to have time to rewind and relax and be at one withourselves, but it’s not just a one and done thing. It’s an equation, so to speak. A bubble bath alone will not fix your problems. HOWEVER! Attending therapy weekly or biweekly, beginning to understand what exactly your problems, trauma, and triggers are, and learning to listen to your body, + a bubble bath will! It’s not a one and done kinda thing. It is a forever evolving process for the rest of your life, but guess what! It’s your life and it’s a pretty short one in the scheme of things so why not enjoy it and live it to the fullest while you can?

Let’s get down to business, and, no. Not to defeat the Huns. Let me tell you right now, self-care isn’t easy, and it sure as hell not always fun. Sometimes self care is having that hard conversation with your partner and figuring it out. Sometimes it’s having that hard conversation with yourself. It’s going to therapy and crying your eyes out. It’s fighting addiction. It’s leaving behind a toxic person who you love. We live so easily in denial, all of the time with ourselves and others. It’s easy to say it’s fine, it’s okay, I’m good! It’s harder to admit that you are broken. That you are not okay. Self care ain’t for the weak of heart. Not everyone can really truly do it. It’s a fight you have to have every single day.

Growing up, I think at some point in our lives, we wanted to be super heroes. I still sometimes think, if I could have one super power, what would it be?? Over the years, my answer has changed. One year I wished I had the power to talk to animals, the next, being a insecure Jr. High student surrounded by mean girls, I wished I could read people’s minds. Today, I wish I could teleport places by just thinking about it.

We all want to be super heroes. We want to be brave, strong, powerful, special, and appreciated. Taking care of ourselves is a lot like being a superhero. It’s brave. It’s a show of strength. It’s so powerful it could change not only your life but others lives around you. It’s special. And, even if you don’t see the change at first, it is appreciated it.

As I have discussed many times on this platform, I am a huge advocate for therapy. Any chance I can get, my answer to most of people’s problems include them finding a therapist, because I know just how good it is. However, I wasn’t raised in therapy. We really didn’t even talk about it until my mom sent us to one when I was in high school. Now that I am able to look back at what 15 old Alexandra thought versus almost 23 year old Alexandra thinks. I’m here to break the cycle of unchecked trauma, of unchecked toxic emotions, of any negative traits for not only my future self but almost my future family!

What are you doing today, that will make you a better person in a month? In a year? In 5 years? In 10? You got it.

Below are links to different ways you can find a therapist in your area, and of course, you’re more to welcome to message me about it! Let’s set you up to succeed.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapistshttps://www.betterhelp.com

For the past few months I have been pushing myself in ways I didn’t even know possible. I remember I looked at myself in the mirror and thought, girl you need to go run, so I went. In the middle of the day in Charleston, South Carolina in 102 degree humid heat, I ran. And ran. And when Hemy decided he was done running for the day and refused to stand up, I picked that little boy up in my arms and ran. And then the next day, I got myself out of bed and I ran and ran and ran. Pretty soon, for the next 3 months with just a few days of a break, I was consistently running every single day. Can I just admit to you that I absolutely hate running? My ankles are weak, my knees crack, and I gallop like a horse. Yet, I kept going. In the middle of my run one day, i thought, ya know. With all of this running, I should probably have some type of goal, and so I signed up for the local 5k. About a month or so before my race, I was up to running 9 or 10 miles consistently. At that point, I decided that instead of the 5k, I was going to run the half marathon, 13.1 miles. Was I crazy? Yes. Absolutely, which is why I kept it pretty quiet and to myself. It was something I was working towards, a goal. Something I haven’t had in months. Something I could do! So, this past Saturday, I ran my first (and perhaps last) half marathon. I did it! I’m pretty damn proud of myself❤️

I hope this week brings you joy, growth, love, and appreciation for all of the beautiful things around you.

https://youtu.be/aIEJ9XpiujQ

Today’s Mantra:

“I AM taking care of myself and those I love.”

blessings, a