I took my first spring break trip with my best friend Mary Elizabeth this past week. I have been SICK of the gross weather Arkansas seems to continue to produce pre-spring season and needed to leave. So, we booked a condo, packed our bags, and left. 10 glorious hours later, legs wobbling like new born giraffes, I was in my happy place. The soft white sand below me, the sound of the waves hitting the shore, the wind against my cheek, I’m such a better person on the beach. You know that feeling of complete and utter happiness? For me, those moments occur when I’m driving with the window down, blaring loud music, riding on the back of a motorcycle, screaming my head off on a rollercoaster, stepping on a beach after a long time away, a warm hug, a sweet kiss…. Those are some of the things that make me the happiest.
We slept every night with the windows open, the sound of the waves soothing us to sleep. We were so cool and hip and young and went to bed around 10 every night. We are old people. In my defense, I never get to sleep, so this vacation, I slept any chance I could.
We spent every day on the beach, me snoozing, reading a romance novel, day drinking mimosas (so classy), eating fresh fruit, and doing absolutely positively nothing at all. I’m quite proud of myself for taking this trip. Not only did I fully take a vacation for me, but I have been working like crazy to support myself, and this was the first time I really truly got to do something really nice for me. Sure, paying for school or paying for my car is for me, but those are also a necessity. This was the first time in which I was comfortable with taking care of myself and doing nice things for me. A little self care goes a long way.
I honest to God did not want to come home. Friends, you are so welcome, because if I didn’t leave, all would be well in my world, and there would be no fresh and juicy content in which would inspire me to rambling on this blog.
Last week, I discussed doing more things spontaneously. For me, this is a huge goal. and a giant obstacle. As discussed with my therapist (who I missed very much last week and definitely gave a hug to this afternoon)…. I’m a bit of a control freak. (wha-wha?? Say it ain’t so!) Ding ding ding. You caught me. So, being spontaneous is very difficult for me. I’m working on it. I truly am. Example A. We found a fantastic condo, beach front, cheap, easy. We got to Alabama, exhausted after our drive and found out that we were in fact too young to check in (25 years old was the minimum age). But guess what guys. I didn’t freak out. Instead, I took off my shoes, walked out to the beach, laid in the sand with my eyes shut while breathing in the sweet salty air. It all worked out and we found a place that was even better than our original condo.
I’m working to improve. I know I will never be that person who just goes with the flow, wherever the wind may take me, but that’s okay. Don’t push something on yourself to be a certain way if it’s just something you could never do. However, don’t be completely against it. Open your mind, your heart, your thoughts to how you can improve on you and be better. I find myself repeating the mantra of if it won’t matter in 5 years, don’t worry more than 5 minutes about it. And y’all. That’s the damn truth of the matter. None of this silly stuff will matter. Take a look at high school. Can you 100% remember every bad day you had or bad feeling you had? Does it matter now? So, don’t sweat the easy stuff. 
For me, I logically have to think things through. My heart and my mind are forever at war with each other, wanting to take over the other. This year, I am working towards finding the peace so that one is not overwhelming the other. All I can control is myself.
But honestly, WHAT THE HELL ARE WE SO SCARED FOR???? It’s fear, holding us back. Stop the fear, break the fear, do what you need to do. Pack that backpack, buy that plane ticket, book that hotel, try exotic food, go out with that person, laugh your head off, say hello to people, go out dancing in the rain. Nike had it right when they said just do it. Because you gotta just do it. 
Have a great week, enjoy this sunny beautiful weather we are having, because you sure as heck know I am! And do something spontaneous this week.
Also! I am taking appointments to photos for April and May. Please message me as soon as possible because lordy, times are flying like hot tamales! Limited time only!
Today’s Mantra:
“I AM living my dreams.”
love your goals so much that you break your fear.
blessings, a
Little Alexx Blog 