There are so many themes I could discuss today. So much has been circling my mind, and I’m going to just spitfire them out to you, so try to keep up! I have been listening to Jenna Kutcher’s “Goal Digger” podcasts and she has really gotten me thinking, as much as I sometimes hate to admit it. When thinking about branding, it’s a very open and vulnerable question to ask yourself. My brand is me. I’m selling me, basically. My mind, my ideas, my posts, etc. So, I have to figure out who I even am. Super easy question to ask a single 21 year old female, right??? WHO. ARE. YOU. the world asks of me, as I cower in the corner, not sure how to yet answer that question. 
I made a list of things that I think make me, me. But can fuzzy socks truly a personality trait? I think yes. I definitely have my ‘basic’ moments, yeah, I really really love Grey’s Anatomy! Who doesn’t? I once wrote an entire blog post about my love for it, only to send it to drafts. Maybe I’ll bring it out one day.
So, who even am I? I have been thinking about this for, oh, my whole existence, but deeply for the past few days. Some days I can just blow it off, I’m who I am, and that’s all I need, but it’s a HARD question to ask yourself. It forces you to really get down to the nitty gritty of not only what makes you, you, but also brings about a little bit of self doubt. So, in Jenna Kutcher’s podcast, she discusses about being “authentically you”, showing off your scars and all those things you have insecurities about. She goes on to talk about how no one likes the perfect girl in the lunchroom. I had to pause the podcast while I drove because it really got me thinking. Am I a likeable person? Do people look at me and think, huh, I could totally be her friend! Am I relatable?
How can I become more relatable??? In my experience, you can’t. Because if you try, you become the Hillary Clinton of trying to be relatable to the youth. You try to hard, and you become, well, a try hard. It’s not natural. It’s not SINCERE.
We all have a view or feeling about someone else. I had someone call me fancy, not too long ago and it made me giggle. You see this version of me, this airbrushed, lashes on, contacts in, jewelry and outfit picked out to perfection, fro controlled, version of the perfected Alexandra and just think my life is together. I’m so far from fancy. What you don’t see 99% of the time is the no makeup, glasses on, hair in bun or a frizzy mess that I have refused to brush for a week, wearing an oversized sweatshirt and boxers running around in my fuzzy socks and slippers. That’s the real Alexandra. And I’m not afraid of showing that! However, just because I’m not afraid to show it, doesn’t mean I have to show it.
So, either you are attracted to me or you are repelled by me. I’m not talking physically. I’m talking about when I’m on here, discussing what’s on my heart. Literally, sometimes I read my past work and cringe, like Alexandra! What the hell were you even thinking?!? But friends, this is the real me! The cringy, gross, neat freak, perfectionist (except for my grammar and spelling, whoops!), vain as hell, stubborn, loudmouth, weirdo that you seem to keep coming back to hear more from! I mean thank you so much. Truly. The reason I started this blog was literally because I was so entirely sick of myself. Do you ever just think, “ugh, self, you are annoying. Go away for a while” ? Same. I really love myself, truly. But I have some serious moments of thinking that I’m behind somehow, that I’m not doing enough for myself or for others.
I went home this weekend to surprise my family, knowing I won’t be able to see them for another month or so. My mom knew, but the rest of everyone was completely surprised. Both Nick and Bella were on court for court-warming and I was so proud of both of them. They both looked so great and I don’t know anyone who was more deserving than the dynamic duo. It makes me happy that Bella has Nick, because I always wanted an older brother. I got stuck with Nick as a freshman when I was a senior and past the point of caring, but I never got that older brother protective wing that Bella gets.
It was a nice break at home, because this week came and kicked my butt. I have three exams on Valentine’s Day…. Happy love day to me! This year, my Valentine’s Day plans are to celebrate with my favorite gal pals, and treat them like the queens they are! It’s one of my favorite days of the year, so in honor of it, please take some time and click on this link to send a sweet Valentine’s Day to a card to a child in the Arkansas Children’s Hospital. Let’s give these sweet kiddos a little extra love this week.
In honor of this being Love Month, what are we doing to give a little love to others? The smallest things. Holding the door for someone instead of barely slipping through. Helping pick up papers that fall, instead of turning your head and walking past, smiling and saying good morning to those around you. Playing peek a boo with the baby staring at you in line to get coffee. Giving someone a pencil if their’s doesn’t seem to be working…. “come on, Alexandra, I don’t have time for any of this!” Actually, you do. It takes 4 seconds to hold the door someone, 5 seconds to help pick up papers, a slight movement of your mouth in an upward position and 1 second to say good morning, a few minutes and a couple of little baby giggles to play peek a boo, a slight reach over for another pencil to give someone yours. It’s not that you don’t have time, it’s that you really don’t care or want to care. What if everyone did one nice thing for someone today? What if you smiled at someone who hasn’t been smiled to for a while? What if you actually cared? What if someone actually cared about you, for only 5 seconds of their day? It would mean the absolute world to you.
I really love getting your messages, private and public. Let me ask you this. Are you being honest with yourself? Are you relatable? Are you helping others as much as you are helping yourself? Would you be friends with you? Who are you?
Today’s Mantra:
“Love is who I AM.”
loving you for you, and for the love from your soul.
Blessings, a
Little Alexx Blog 